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Surf these sites in your spare time. They aren't the right topic for the "adventures" blog, so this more or less covers everything else.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Letter

For all of you who have ever considered actually telling someone the thing you are thinking and for those who are too afraid, try this approach: write a letter to no one. Don't address it. Don't add clues. Write a letter not for the receiver, but for you. You'll feel better when you do.

To whom it may concern:

I miss you. Not the same as I did before, but I miss you. I search for glimpses of you and your work but never seem to find you. I know you are still out there. I've gotten over all of it now and I just want to be able to talk to you like before. I wish I could just sit down and write you a letter, but where would I send it? One of the worst things about just giving your information is waiting for the other person to initiate a conversation.

The worst part is, it isn't just you. It is you too. Long past and forgotten by all but me (I'm sure), you haunt me. I keep asking myself the same question: why did you come to my show? Why did you appear like there was no difference so long after? Now I feel like it is finally possible to be friends again. But I hate making the first call.

And finally you. The longest of this running charade and the only one whom I don't fear contacting, you mean nothing to me anymore, but I still feel like I should remain connected. What for? I fear I could never trust you again.

What does this mean? Why should you care? You shouldn't. This letter isn't to you; or is it? Only three spin in my mind and only one stands a chance. And the one that does will never read it. But like I said, I miss you. ~Me

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